Letting Go Of Disappointment and Anger!!!

Today is November 21, seven days after my son’s 13th birthday. Yes, my lil big man turned thirteen on November 14, 2013. As you can tell he was a millennium baby as his age is synced with changing of the years, but I'm not writing about him today. I am focusing this blog on his father who has been missing from his life for 10 years now. I could call him a deadbeat dad or trifling, but that won't serve a purpose. It will only make me seem bitter and angry, and I am so past that now. I have made a conscious decision to let go of the anger, hurt and disappointment my son's father has caused my son and me over the years. I came to this conclusion about a few months ago but it really sunk in a couple days after my son's birthday, because he didn’t receive anything from his father.

            My child was hurt and disappointed, and yes I was angry as hell but I realized something and that was my son is doing just fine without his father. There's no need for me to stress about his father not coming through for him on his birthday, Christmas or any other time. Yes, it's hard for me to raise him on my own but by the Grace of God and help from my family I'm doing it and, if I have to say so myself I'm doing damn good job. I came to understand I can't make my son’s father be the father I want him to be for our son. Or that I can’t make or force him to take a more emotional and financial responsibility for our son. All I can do is be the best damn single mom and parent for my son, and just let go of all the anger, hurt and disappointment. That is exactly what I'm going to do and I said so in a letter I wrote to my son's father.

            I explained to him that I forgive him for not being there for our son and me, and I wish well in his life. I know this is for the best because letting go of this past hurt will allow an abundant blessings and peace to enter my son’s life and my life.

A Brand New Kinda Of Me!!!!

It's the New Year!! 2013 is here and it's time for me to step into my season and be my true self. My true self is a Beautiful, Strong, Intelligent, Unique, Amazing, Ambitious and Vivacious Diva, and to help me accomplish this I will be using CoverGirl Blast flipstick. CoverGirl Blast flipstick is a dual sided lipstick of two different shades that can be worn alone or together, and offers the versatility of creating new exciting and sexy 13 looks for your lips for the New Year. Blast flipstick is the perfect the state for me. I have fallen in love with CoverGirl Blast flipstick, and the 13 combinations of shades that are offered. I find myself mixing and matching some of the shades to create my own unique signature look for my lips. Some of my favorite shades of CoverGirl Blast flipstick are Vixen, Minx, Flashy, Glimmer, Stunner and Intense. Not only does CoverGirl Blast flipstick offer me different shades to experiment and create different looks for my lips, but it also offers great moisturizing for my lips. When using this lipstick I noticed my lips are softer and smoother, and it's all due to the more sure rising formal in Blast flipstick. To sum it all up I am a huge fan of CoverGirl Blast flipstick. 

 

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A NEW YEAR, A NEW ME!!!!!

Today is the second day of the New Year, 2013. When 2012 rolled out and 2013 came roaring in I made a declaration to myself and that was, “I would no longer be afraid to live life, and that 2013 was my year and season to step into the person God may need to be”. I have lived my life for too long not being the person I was meant to be, and it not only hurt me but also my son. I have lived my life like a hermit for the past nine years, only coming out for family functions, going shopping and handling personal and professional matters from my son and me. All the other times I stayed secluded to myself locked in my apartment with the door shut and blinds closed. I live this way for nine years and have come to the conclusion this is no way to live life. In order for me to have a productive happy fulfilling life I must get out into the world and live it. I used to live life to the fullest before I had my son 12 years ago, but that all changed after having him. I am not blaming him because he is my world and I love being a mother. It is one of greatest joys and purpose of my life. What I am saying is I could not reconcile the woman I was becoming with being a mother, so I put that woman on the shelf and just became a mother. Now I see that was a mistake because it caused a lot of self doubt and damage to my self-confidence, worth, esteem and value. I now know that I must merge the woman I was becoming with the mother I am now, in order for me to be happy. So 2013, is the merging of Tamika Nakisha Vaughn the mother and woman I was meant to be. It's a brand-new me on a brand-new journey.